Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen in Her Early Twenties

Okay. It's Monday morning. Again. I woke up feeling less than stellar and had one of those  mornings again. But I'm here. Barely; but here. My brain is definitely not yet fully functioning...so, I was hoping you would humor me for a brief, indulgent post. I'll give you something more substantial later; I promise. But for now...

Can we just talk about LiLo for a minute?? Ahhh, Lindsay, Lindsay, Lindsay. Am I the only one that misses the loveable, freckly little delight from The Parent Trap and even Mean Girls? I had such high hopes for LiLo. I thought she'd turn out something like Dakota Fanning did, all cute and mature and normal...but, alas...it appears as though she's ended up among the ranks of other, [slightly] washed up child stars with a string of bad decisions, rehab stints and misdemeanors to their names.

...and have you seen a picture of the necklace that ignited this latest slew of TMZ LiLo reports?

Source

...seriously? Cute, yes. Worth $2,500? Uh, hardly. Even less worth stealing [while already on probation, no less] and risking a felony misdemeanor theft charge, jail time and community service. Call me crazy...but seeing as to how she ended up with a sentence of 120 days in jail, 480 hours of community service (180 of which have to served in the county MORGUE), and $75,000 bail...she shoulda just bought the damn necklace. You've gotta figure; you have to post at least 10%, right? That comes out to $7,500. Yeah. You're math is right. For the $7,500 it cost her to get out of jail, she could have bought THREE of those necklaces...and sent me one. Am I right?? 

Well, good ol' LiLo obviously disagreed. 'Cause she took it. And then wore it out. And then was photographed wearing it. Really?! Why does she always take pictures wearing her stolen booty? If you remember, Linds had another jewelry incident in 2006 when someone allegedly stole a Hermès Birkin bag full of her jewelry, worth "about $1 million." Oh yeah, and then again in 2009 when some $500K worth of Dior diamonds she wore during a photo shoot went myseteriously missing (low key, i can't blame her; j'adore Dior, aussi). And let us not forget the $11,000 mink coat she "accidentally" took from Manhattan night club, and the $35,000 Rolex she may or may not have stolen from a "friend" in 2010.

Hmmm...I'm beginning to notice a trend here. Perhaps people should monitor their jewels a little bit closer when Sticky Fingaz Lohan is in the room. I'm just saying, I think Louis Vuitton has the right idea; I'd refuse to work with her, too. Maybe she thinks that since she's a "star" that she is entitled to amazing swag from people...even if it's unbeknownst to the owner. That would be a pretty sweet deal. If that were the case...but it isn't. Sorry, Linds. I don't think you're as big a star as you would like to think. If you were, you probably wouldn't resort to stealing stuff in order to be fabulous for the paparazzi.