Gitmo Got Mo’ Civilians than Terrorists

Well, I’m about halfway into my morning, and I came across an interesting article about Guantanamo Bay. Apparently, 1/5 of the inmates being held at Gitmo were arbitrarily imprisoned and cannot be directly linked to terrorism, or any enemy combatants, for that matter (thanks, wikileaks).

Really, America? (Hold onto your hats, kids. This is about to get really wordy.)

I can’t say that I’m surprised. We all had to know that there was some fishy business going on down there in Cuba, right? Why else would the prison be located in a place that Americans are not permitted to visit? Due to bans on trade and poor relations with Fidel Commie Badass Castro, you would think that Cuba would be the last place to house a US detention facility…but I digress. I have to say – I’m not surprised in the least. America has a history [albeit a quiet, little-known one] of concentration internment camps for when the going gets tough.

Uh-oh. Did I just lose some of you? It’s true; I swear. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried. Don’t worry; this isn’t going to turn into some conspiracy theory blog. I just think it’s important to educate our society about the real history of America, with all of its blemishes, witch hunts and dirty little secrets. Otherwise, how will our future children learn from our mistakes (and our parents mistakes, and their parents mistakes, and so on and so forth)? Now, where was I? Oh, yes. Concentration Internment camps. Yeah. We had ‘em. Here in the good ol’ U.S. of A. Not something you hear about too often, but true, nonetheless.

During WWII, American concentration internment camps were pretty much the new black. You know how the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor in 1941? Well, much like the Twin Towers nightmare in 2001, that bombing induced a state of mass hysteria, which ultimately led to a rabid focus on Japanese-Americans. Yeah. You read right. Japanese-AMERICANS. People of Japanese descent living in America. American citizens, even. So FDR signed Executive Order 9066 and about 120,000 people of Japanese descent were forced from their homes and normal lives and shipped off to concentration internment camps. More than 2/3 of the prisoners internees were American citizens; 1/2 of them were children. Riddle me this: exactly how would children act as government spies? I'm just curious. Special training, like with the Olympics? If that’s the case, the Chinese could potentially have a whole gang of diminutive spies. After watching the opening games in Beijing, I’m pretty sure they might be the only ones who could orchestrate an army of in-tempo, drum-beating, awe-inspiring, awesome, little brainiac children with amazing attention spans and the courage of ten full-grown lions. None of those that were imprisoned detained were convicted of treason. In fact, during the war, a grand total of TEN people were convicted of spying for Japan…they were all Caucasian.

The fun doesn't stop there: there were also German concentration internment camps in the US, which [not so] surprisingly, were filled not only with Nazis and Nazi supporters, but with regular German citizens (who obviously had direct liaisons with Hitler). What’s really interesting is that the Nazi prisoners were often allowed to act as enforcers in these camps, because the Americans appreciated the discipline and order that they instilled amongst the prisoners. Hmmm…I can’t really wrap my mind around that. If they appreciated the “discipline and order” of the Nazis, perhaps they were fighting on the wrong side. This is confusing to me.

…and last, but certainly not least, let’s not forget REX 84, originally established as an answer to the imminent threat of an immigrant invasion from Mexico. Ha! Imminent threat? Immigrant invasion? From Mexico? I’m not holding my breath on this one. I have a feeling I’ll be riding a hoverboard before our immediate neighbor to the south rallies the troops and invades our country. But that’s just me. Proactive, yes? Silly, double [hell] yes. Interestingly, an Executive Order from the Bush/Cheney Administration repurposed these existing facilities to ones that would accommodate any need we might have to detain dissidents and others that might be harmful to the US. Oh yeah, and as a place for Americans to go in a state of emergency.

Ummm…I’ve seen the movies. Martial Law? Nah, I’m gonna go ahead and pass on the government trucks transporting loads of Americans to camps lined with barbed wire “for their protection.” Although, I don’t know about you – but the idea of these camps is kind of a huge relief for me. I often spend my days wondering where dissidents will be sent to their doom. Thanks, guys. That's one less thing to lie awake at night feeling anxious about. I feel a lot safer knowing that I don’t have to worry about it anymore; we have an array of concentration camps waiting to be filled up right here.*** Hurry up and follow through with that Executive Order, Obama! Don’t fret; we’ve got lots of space.


For you naysayers:
Read more about Japanese Internment Camps here.
Read more about REX 84 here.
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*In case you missed it, that was sarcasm.

**Fingers crossed that Kim Jong-Il quits dicking around (or just disappears altogether) so I don’t have to worry about being seized in the night. Hmmm…maybe I’d catch a break since I’m only half? Food for thought…